Monday, September 7, 2015

REIGN OF FIRE (2002)

REIGN OF FIRE opens kinda alright in 2002 with a teenage boy being the first person to see a dragon rising up out of the ground.  Then, during the opening credits, we're told about how badass the dragons are and how all of the military forces in the world couldn't defeat them and how they fought tooth and nail in all of these super badass battles until finally....in 2020 everything has been burned up and now all we're left with is a bunch of half-starved survivors cowering in a blown up castle doing absolutely nothing.  Just waiting to die.  The leader of this band of nobodies is Christian Bale who somehow, in this grim environment, has found enough energy and protein to get yoked.

Then, in rides the equally yoked up Matthew McConaughey as an American soldier with a small army consisting of soldiers, a few armored vehicles and even a helicopter!  Some macho, alpha male posturing happens followed by a small dragon skirmish to show the viewer how these American studs deal with the dragons.  It's mildly exciting.  After that, more alpha male stuff happens until the boss fight at the end.  Yawn.

I went into REIGN OF FIRE expecting tons of dragon versus human action.  Droves of helicopters versus a thousand flying dragons, well-armed soldiers fighting dragons in awesome street combat scenes....nope, instead we get a handful of stragglers quivering in fear and then some soldiers dudes that end up only killing two dragons total!  Double yawn.

Mediocre acting by Bale and McConaughey (I honestly expected better from both of them), weak story, okay special effects, lame dragon vision, fake as fook looking tattoos, nearly all male cast, young Joffery, unsatisfying beginning, middle and ending.  It's easy to see why this tanked at the box office after it's opening weekend.  Skip it.